Father Of Mine by Everclear

Father of mine
Tell me where have you been?
You know I just closed by eyes
My whole world disappeared
Father of mine
Take me back to the day
Yeah, when I was still your golden boy
Back before you went away

I remember blue skies walking the block
I loved it when you held me high
I loved to hear you talk
You would take me to the movie
You would take me to the beach
You would take me to a place inside
That's so hard to reach

Oh!
Father of mine
Tell me where did you go?
Yeah, you had the world inside your hand
But you did not seem to know
Father of mine
Tell me what do you see?
When you look back at your wasted life
And you don't see me

I was ten years old
Doin' all that I could
It wasn't easy for me to be a scared white boy
In a black neighborhood
Sometimes you would send me a birthday card
With a five dollar bill
I never understood you then
And I guess I never will

(Then he walked away)
Daddy gave me a name
My daddy gave me a name
(Then he walked away)
[ From: http://www.elyrics.net/read/e/everclear-lyrics/father-of-mine-lyrics.html ]
Daddy gave me a name
(Then he walked away)
My daddy gave me a name
Oh yeah

Yeah
Daddy gave me a name
Daddy gave me a name
(Then he walked away)
Daddy gave me a name
(Then he walked away)
My daddy gave me a name
Yeah
Yeah
Oh yeah

Father of mine
Tell me where have you been?
Yeah, I just closed by eyes
And the world disappeared
Father of mine
Tell me how do you sleep?
With the children you abandoned
And the wife I saw you beat

I will never be safe
I will never be sane
I will always be weird inside
I will always be lame
Now I'm a grown man
With a child of my own
And I swear, I'll never let her know
All the pain I have known

(Then he walked away)
Daddy gave me a name
(Then he walked away)
My daddy gave me a name
(Then he walked away)
My daddy gave me a name
(Then he walked away)
My daddy gave me a name

(Then he walked away)
Yeah
(Then he walked away)
Yeah
(Then he walked away)
Oh yeah

What's wrong with me. What's wrong with you?

Daddy why didn't you protect me ???  Why did you not save me ???  Why daddy why???

 You just left me and I needed you to be there for me but you never cared.  For over 30 years I kept this secret because I know that it was my fault I should have never got into the car of those two Mexicans but I was only 13 and wanted to see the Seniors powder puff game where the cheerleaders are the football players and the football team dress up as the cheerleaders.  I thought that it would be so cool for me to be able to sneak in and just to be there.  This Mexican guy  over heard wishing out loud and said that he would take me if I really wanted to go.  And I did.  Mom was gone probably at work so she didn't know and I was never gonna tell her and get beat with in a inch of my life.  I don't think so.  All I knew about this guy was he was very big, Mexican and called himself Marty.
 When Marty and his much older friend came and got me and I was alone in the back seat not really paying much attenuation where we were really going to.  But out somewhere they stop the car and one got in to the back with me on one side while the other guy got into the back with me on the other.  Marty was kind of kissing me I thought I guess it's okay it was just kissing no big deal.  But suddenly it became more and I screamed for them to stop I hit them with my fist just mainly just trying to get them off of me.  It hurt so bad.  At some point they got out of the car and were speaking Spanish which I do not understand so I figured this was it for me.  But no they both got into the front seat and drove me home.  And I took the longest hottest shower that I could stand.
 I told no one because I know what the cops would say something like it was all my fault and then mom would know and the beating she would have given me.
I never told you because you where never there to protect me you didn't save me like you did Elaine; Tim and Steven.  I cried ever time on the plane when you lied and said you would fight for custody of me next time  and the next time  and the next time.

I remember when you told me  that you were glad that I was still a virgin ; How then could I ever tell you what happened when I 13?  I just never thought how I could.